my seven core values

Everything and everyone will try to define your life.  Your church, your family, your problems, your victories–everyone!  Everything! I have discovered we need to be very intentional about who we want to become.

A pastor asked me about a year ago–who are you becoming?  Insightful question.  If I followed you for the next 24 hours, I can tell you what you will become in the next 24 years.  Your attitudes, your discipline and your approach to life. 

Who are you becoming?

For 10 years now I have been working on what I call “life blueprints”.  I have life blueprints on my finances, fitness, spiritual life, emotional life, leadership, speaking, and core values.  These life blueprints define who I am becoming. 

Here are seven core values I have been working on the last 10 years.  I evaluate my life on these seven values often.  These are the things I want people to talk about at my funeral.

1.  Intimacy with God—I love God with all my heart, soul and mind.  This is why I was born.

2. Personal Growth–I am a learner. I love to grow. I love to change.

3. Indisputable Character–Who I am is more important than what I do

4. Family Commitment–My wife and two girls are the centerpiece of my life.

5.  Authentic Relationships–I build authentic relationships by being transparent and intentional

6. Financial Strength–I honor God in every spending decision I make

7. Physical Health–My body is the temple of the Holy Spirit.  I take care of God’s house.

prayer and planning retreats

For the last 10 years I have done what I call prayer and planning retreats. I started this habit in 1999.  I have been taking notes on each of them every year.  Recently Jana has just joined me. I do these twice a year. One in December (to reflect on year and get ready for next year) and one in July (mid year check up)

They are simple.  I go to a hotel for two nights.  I eat meals with Jana and spend the rest of the time by myself.  I pray and plan.  Typically I break these into 2-3 hours chunks of time.  (we may sneak away for a movie and some other fun things)

Here is what I do:

• Pray
• Read Bible
• Journal (ask myself tough questions)
• Reflect on personal core values and personal mission statement
• Review personal goals
• Review what I call road rules and “one rules” in my life
• Ask God for a new dream
• Sleep
• Read a book
• Write out  prayers
• Listen to a pod cast
• Write a letter to someone
• Call a friend
• Take an honest look at my spiritual and emotional life
• Review goals for new life
• Write
• Think about next years teaching series
• Thank God for life

The toughest part of this is doing it.  Putting it on the calendar and saying–yes I am getting away. 

I can’t tell you the benefit of this time.  Jesus withdrew from the crowds.  He needed time alone…if Jesus needed time alone–how much more do I need time alone? 

If  I don’t spend time alone–I will have nothing to give when I am with people.

the grace of giving

 

About one year ago I put together some practical thoughts around giving.  I have had so many people make comments how helpful this was and is to them.  Here it is…we must excel in giving.  I pray in 2009 we would all discover the grace of giving

  

In 2 Corinthians 8:7 Paul said, “But just as you excel in everything – in faith, in speech, in knowledge, in complete earnestness and in your love for us – see that you also excel in this grace of giving.”

 

For those who call New Life home, giving cheerfully and sacrificially of our finances is part of our worship. A believer does not work to accumulate personal wealth or possessions, but to be a good steward of God’s resources and model Jesus to our brothers, sisters, and community.

 

Our mission is to lead people into a growing relationship with Jesus Christ. One of the primary ways we serve God is by cheerfully giving God our “firstfruits” (2 Corinthians 9:7; Proverbs 3:9).  God expects us to give, not to meet some petty, required percentage, but by digging deep and sacrificing for the sake of the gospel because Jesus sacrificed for us and all that we have is His anyway.

 

People ask me questions all the time around the subject of giving and specifically tithing.  Here are responses to some of those questions:

 

1.     What is the difference between tithing and giving?

        Principle: They are both found in Scripture.  Giving is what we were born to do.  Tithing is a very specific way we give.  Tithing defines God’s beginning point in our giving as Christ followers.

 

        Practice:  Jana and I love giving.  We tithe 10% to the local church and then give to missions, building fund and other heart felt opportunities. Tithing is a floor for us, not a ceiling.  We are not paralyzed by meeting some petty, required percentage – we are driven to be good stewards of God’s resources.

 

2.     What is a tithe?

        Principle:  The literal meaning of the word tithe is “a tenth” or 10%.  A tithe is the firstfruit of your harvest.  This is given to God through your home church in faith as a practical means to finance the mission of the church (Malachi 3:8-10, Matthew 23:23)

 

        Practice:  Jana and I have been tithing for almost 30 years. (It was easier when I worked at McDonald’s).  We believe in the local church and that our tithes make a difference.

 

3.    How do you tithe?

        Principle:  Find a systematic way to tithe.  Such as following each paycheck, once a month, or having it automatically taken out of your check, etc. (1 Corinthians 16:2)

 

        Practice:  Jana and I have our tithe automatically taken out of each check.  This makes it very simple.

 

4.    What kind of attitude should I have when I tithe?

        Principle:  The Bible says, “Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver” (2 Corinthians 9:7).

 

        Practice:  Most of the time Jana and I give cheerfully.  Sometimes out of pure discipline. But we do it because we love God and people.  We also think giving is foundational to being a healthy human being (1 Corinthians 13:3).

 

5.    Isn’t tithing just an Old Testament concept?

        Principle:  Giving is a Biblical concept.  Tithing is found in the Old Testament.  Generous and sacrificial giving is found in the New Testament (Acts 2:42-47, Acts 4:32-35). Tithing is not explicitly commanded in the New Testament but the bar is raised considerably by Christ and the apostles of the early church.  Christians must give whenever there is a need to be met.  Those who get lost in a percentage amount have lost the whole point of giving.

 

        Practice:  Usually this question implies the New Testament requires less giving.  Actually the opposite is true.  In the New Testament they actually sold land and gave it to the church.   The New Testament church went way beyond the tithe.  This is why tithing is just a beginning point in my giving.

 

6.    Should I give first to missions or tithe?

        Principle: Our first and foremost responsibility is to tithe.  This is both a scriptural truth and a practical truth.

 

        Practice:  Here are priorities of our giving:  We tithe first, give to missions second and then prioritize our building commitment and other heartfelt areas as God leads us.

 

 

 

7.     If I send kids to camp or am not reimbursed for ministry expenses can I include that as part of my tithe?

        Principle:  No!  The tithe belongs to the storehouse (Malachi 3:8-10).

 

        Practice:  Personally I love paying kids way to camp.  It is worth every penny. This is why Jana and I push ourselves in giving beyond tithing.

 

8.    What should I do if I can’t afford to tithe? Can I start with a smaller amount?

        Principle:  Start somewhere.  The Biblical standard is to tithe. Honestly, you can’t afford NOT to tithe.  If you wait until you can afford it—you will never start.  Start today!

 

        Practice:  I think the big question is “are you going backward or forward with your giving?”  No matter how much you give or don’t give right now – we should always be asking this question.

 

9.    I want to tithe but my spouse doesn’t want to, what should I do?

        Principle:  Very good question.  Be on the same page with your spouse.  Most people don’t reject the idea of giving.  Instead of pushing the “tithe” concept agree on charitable giving.  You will be surprised how open your spouse may be about giving if you frame it in the context that we should give back to this world.

 

        Practice:  My wife likes tithing.

 

10.   Is tithing just an adult thing? When should my children begin to tithe?

        Principle:  You can’t start too young to teach your kids to tithe (and save).

 

        Practice:  Since my girls were walking I have made sure they tithed 10% and saved 10%.  I tried to get them to give to me 10% but Jana wouldn’t let me go there.

 

11.   Do I need to tithe on a financial gift? Tax return? Bonuses?

        Principle:  If in doubt, tithe.

 

        Practice:  Yes, on the financial gift and bonuses.  I don’t tithe on my tax return because I already tithed on my gross.  (Although, a tax return is a great opportunity to be a generous giver)

 

12.   Can I tithe through volunteering my time and saving the church staffing expense?

        Principle:  We need to learn to financially give our money and time. The answer is no.

 

        Practice:  Jana and I give my time and money.

 

13.    Is it ok for me to get a tax deduction from giving?

        Principle: Yes, this is called wisdom.

 

        Practice:  We get a tax deduction for my giving.

 

14.    If I tithe will God bless me financially?

        Principle:  Yes (Proverbs 11:24-25, Proverbs 3:9-10)

 

        Practice:  He has blessed Jana and me.

 

15.   Should I tithe off of my gross income or net (after taxes and deductions)?

        Principle:  If in doubt, round up.  The firstfruits principle would indicate gross.

 

        Practice:  Jana and I tithe on our gross income.

 

16.   Can I give my tithe on a credit card? Is it ok to get airline miles off of my giving?

        Principle:  This scares me.  Although in theory it is possible, you should never go in debt by tithing.  Most people should not consider this option.

           

        Practice:  We have not and do not tithe on my credit card!

 

17.    If I am in debt, should I get out of debt before I begin to tithe?

        Principle:  No, begin to tithe first.  I know this sounds strange but God will open up heaven and begin to give you wisdom to get out of debt.

 

        Practice:  Get out of debt.  Depending on how far in debt you are, I would recommend you get help.  Crown Financial is a great place to start.

 

my spiritual declaration!

I know this may sound too cheesy for some. But, I truly believe the tongue has the power of life and death.  On my iphone I carry with me some powerful defining statements.  I pray these over my life.  I reflect and think on them often.  In my car, during my quiet times and before I go to bed. 

Who do you want to become spirtually?  What do you want your heart to be like? 

Here is what I pray over my life often.

My Declaration

My heart reflects Jesus

I feel deeply

I cry and laugh out loud

I am alive emotionally and spiritually

I have a spark in my eyes

I have energy in my steps

I feel the presence of God

I listen and follow my intuition and discernment

I find joy in small things

At bedtime I search my heart and I am silent

In the morning I am unhurried and reflective

I hunger for the Word of God

My heart burns for the Scriptures

The overflow of my heart speaks life, Jesus and good things

The peace of God umpires my heart in every decision I make

God creates in me a clean heart everyday

The Holy Spirit convicts me of sin, guides me into truth and walks with me everyday

why do we forget?

It’s Thanksgiving…my question is why do I forget all the blessings in my life?  or a better question, “why don’t I remember?”  Ok, this isn’t even a good question, maybe the question is “why don’t I appreciate the blessings of God in my life?”….I really don’t forget…I just don’t appreciate.

In my journal today I wrote–I am the most blessed man in the world.  I know this. I understand this.  I started to list all my blessings.  Why do I need a day to remember this?  Maybe I am spoiled.  Maybe all of us are spoiled. Maybe we need to repent of our ingrown/selfish attitude towards life. 

I am so thankful for my wife, two girls, my mom, my inlaws, great church, incredible relationships, America, health, more money than I need, all the toys in the world, a house, food, a car, education, mentors, relatives–and these are just the beginnig…I am forgetting things like the ablity to breath, walk, smile, think, enjoy, laugh, cry, and so much more. 

I am so blessed.  We are so blessed.  God forgive us for not giving you thanks everyday.  Forgive us for not getting up every day and thank you for the blessings in our lives.

Then I read I Timothy 6.  It says to those who are rich don’t be arrogrant and put your hope in wealth.  Then Paul gives five things we should do–put our hope in God, be generous, be willing to share, be rich in good deeds….there is one more I can’t recall it right now….

Am I rich?  Yes!!!  Even the question shows me how selfish we are in America.  We are rich by every standard.  If you have a car–you are rich. 

My prayer this thanksgiving…God help me not forget…I am blessed, I am rich…help me have a deep appreciation for the goodness of God.  Forgive me God for wanting more and not giving more.